Gordon Lightfoot Forums - View Single Post - What Should Gordon Be Writing About Today?

charlene · 04-29-2010, 08:45 AM

and right after the Pres.said he'd allow more oil rigs in the Gulf despite saying he wouldn't when he was campaigning for the job..
there's so many great topics to write songs about..
I got this yesterday:

================================================== ================
C L U B T O P 5
Live from Coffee Cat in Santa Barbara, CA!
================================================== ================

April 28, 2010

NOTE FROM CHRIS:

Just weeks after President Obama unveiled plans
for expanding offshore oil and gas drilling, the
Coast Guard is scrambling to keep a huge slick
in the Gulf of Mexico from reaching the shoreline.

TopFive to the rescue!!

The Top 15 Novel Ideas for Stopping an Oil Slick

15> Post "Free Oil!" ad on Craigslist; it'll be gone in a day.

14> Apply several million tubes of benzoyl peroxide.

13> Use one of those levees the Army Corps of Engineers built
near New Orleans. They work, right?

12> Have Bruce Willis light it up in the big finale of "Diehard:
New Orleans Funeral."

11> 1) Bake you a biscuit the size of Cuba. 2) Start soppin'.

10> First things first: You'll never earn its respect if you
keep calling it "Slick."

9> Push it into the Gulf Stream and let Iceland deal with it.
Volcano payback's a bitch, Bjork!

8> Soak it up with Jenna Jameson's contraceptive sponge.

7> Call it an Petroleum Expansion Pool Aggressive Growth Fund
and get Goldman Sachs to sell shares of it.

6> Borrow Jerry Lewis' comb.

5> Gloss up the cast of "Jersey Shore" for nearly a whole season.

4> Add balsamic vinegar and fresh herbs and get Jamie Oliver
to guilt everybody into eating it.

3> Freeze it with Nancy Pelosi's icy stare; lift and remove.

2> Cover a Northwest airlines plane in Swiffers and have the
pilots aim nowhere near the spill.

and Topfive.com's Number 1 Novel
Idea for Stopping an Oil Slick...

1> Send in the U.S.S. Maxipad.

[ Copyright 2010 by Chris White/TopFive.com ]

04-29-2010, 08:45 AM	#23
charlene Moderator Join Date: May 2000 Posts: 16,001	Re: What Should Gordon Be Writing About Today? and right after the Pres.said he'd allow more oil rigs in the Gulf despite saying he wouldn't when he was campaigning for the job.. there's so many great topics to write songs about.. I got this yesterday: ================================================== ================ C L U B T O P 5 Live from Coffee Cat in Santa Barbara, CA! ================================================== ================ April 28, 2010 NOTE FROM CHRIS: Just weeks after President Obama unveiled plans for expanding offshore oil and gas drilling, the Coast Guard is scrambling to keep a huge slick in the Gulf of Mexico from reaching the shoreline. TopFive to the rescue!! The Top 15 Novel Ideas for Stopping an Oil Slick 15> Post "Free Oil!" ad on Craigslist; it'll be gone in a day. 14> Apply several million tubes of benzoyl peroxide. 13> Use one of those levees the Army Corps of Engineers built near New Orleans. They work, right? 12> Have Bruce Willis light it up in the big finale of "Diehard: New Orleans Funeral." 11> 1) Bake you a biscuit the size of Cuba. 2) Start soppin'. 10> First things first: You'll never earn its respect if you keep calling it "Slick." 9> Push it into the Gulf Stream and let Iceland deal with it. Volcano payback's a bitch, Bjork! 8> Soak it up with Jenna Jameson's contraceptive sponge. 7> Call it an Petroleum Expansion Pool Aggressive Growth Fund and get Goldman Sachs to sell shares of it. 6> Borrow Jerry Lewis' comb. 5> Gloss up the cast of "Jersey Shore" for nearly a whole season. 4> Add balsamic vinegar and fresh herbs and get Jamie Oliver to guilt everybody into eating it. 3> Freeze it with Nancy Pelosi's icy stare; lift and remove. 2> Cover a Northwest airlines plane in Swiffers and have the pilots aim nowhere near the spill. and Topfive.com's Number 1 Novel Idea for Stopping an Oil Slick... 1> Send in the U.S.S. Maxipad. [ Copyright 2010 by Chris White/TopFive.com ]