[jj]

char, i was at city hall yesterday...i had an old photo of an earlier city hall scene from many years ago that my great aunt took...i must post it...the day had started at a more local memorial site (no one there yet except a wonderful wreath display) where I was challenged to explain 'war stuff' to junior...it was a challenge and i was certainly asked some blunt logical questions...last week, junior's uncle had sent a very real 'peacekeeping' photo of himself in 'combat' in Afghanistan...anyhow, it's always mind boggling how much i learn about myself and the world when today's youth puts you on the spot...many of my responses were, "that's actually a very good question"

giving one's life is the ultimate sacrifice but I'd like to acknowledge the many who were left scarred by ww1 and other wars...i don't think there was one single encounter i had with my late grandfather where those scars (none were of the visible nature) didn't surface...this was the case even at our final bedside 'chat' in his ninety-eighth year where he mumbled about the guilt of being able to live on while his best friend's life was taken by a grenade, only a few feet away, back when they were naive teens

they had made a pact with one another, to look after one another's loved ones should one not make it back to England alive...when my grandfather returned he became like a big brother to his dead friend's fiance...they did eventually wed and had a child, my mother...they had taken a post-war boat to Canada based on a prior war bunker small chat/endorsement from a fellow soldier ....my grandmother ultimately took ill but my grandfather visited her every day in hospital (the dementia went on for years) until the end, then he spent his forty years as a widower caring for a farm, stray cats and mutts but mostly glued to his violin

i once commented to him, "you look at the sheet music but you must know these old tunes so well that you probably hardly need it?"...i remember his reply, "yes, i've probably not needed to stare at this notation since the first week i learned these...but it's probably just habit and i am incapable of describing the vivid images of the past i actually see when i play my violin" ...i was left to imagine what he was referring to

something else that stuck was his "i must have been the only one in ww1 who didn't smoke or drink...the only good word i had for a cigarette was when i would light one last one for a dying fellow soldier...or even a dying enemy soldier ...after all, they were just like us, scared and simply following orders from the top...the films paint 'us' as heroes, perhaps, but we were just teenagers following orders...there was no choice that i was aware of...most of us would rather be back home in warm, dry clothes'

'over-glorified' or not, i like to think he served his old and new countrys well....as well as his friend

i guess my point was, for those living with the surviving victims of war, it can seem that every day is in fact a Remembrance Day