[geodeticman]

JJ
Thank you for the compliment. I try very hard to be friendly, and you can always count on me being truthtful and genuine. Oh... and I 'spect talking too much, but I am working on it.LOL

JJ - regarding friendship [the subject] versus the strong presumption of ,and unhealthy worry about on your part concerns me, for your sake. If you wish to speak of it in open forum, versus PM's which I engage in rarely (about 38 in 9 months !), compared to the numbers I hear about.

I feel bad for you JJ, as you wear your heart on your sleeve, as I did when I first came back to PC usage here in corfid, and also , as you, heavily sought peer acceptance too quickly at first, versus now where I am more careful to slowly make friends.

As far as others having a profound effect on how I view you, I make up my own mind, on my own criteria. For those who gossip idly,versus quality talk in either PM or forum, I offer the following once again, despite it being a very bad generalization not always applicable, but thought provoking as I think I said before.

I have a friend I grew up with who is a Russian Orthodox Monk for about 25 years now , after being as wild a womanizer and partyer as I ever knew in High School and College. He also, oddly, was quite the rennaisance man in his interests.

One night where he regretted multiple encounters, he was profoundly struck by the music of GL on the Don Quixote album (he'd never listened to GL before except radio), and John Renbourne's "Sir John a Lot Of"
Rennaisance era-sounding classical guitar album.

He had an epiphone after listening to both, I'd say not due to the music so much as the conversation it stimulated. He decided to shuck the wildoats, booze, and womanizing. "I'll have a thousand before I'm through") - which he may have come close too on the Purdue Campus in Lafayette, Indiana.

He then, of all things, was inspired to pursue education for and ultimately enter the monastic life from there on out. Point of this anecdote in better part is the thought he was mulling over and left with me to consider as a friend.


I'd been complaining and worrying that whole day and evening about who was really a good friend, who was not, and was pointing fingers and being judgemental about others with half-baked knowledge, as was he. He had the revelation, and I was left with the quote to ponder. LOL.

Sort of, "where have our ideals been?, and what do we really hold important?" He was referring to himself most profoundly, but it struck me too.

The following quote is a gross generalization, and does not pertain to the exchanges I have enjoyed with friends in corfid, in PM and forum. But the words are worth contemplating. Sometimes true in part or in full:

* small minds talk about people.
** average minds talk about things.
*** great minds speak of ideas.

JJ I guess the point to ponder may be just worrying to much over "people", versus the higher ideals of what you hold valuable in character, genuine nature, morals, ethics, etc. They come thru in your posts over time. Friends will follow. Friends you try to make too fast will either inadvertantly leave you feeling hurt, or take advantage.

I'd be a lttle more discerning over who and how fast you call friend. For your sake. And others tend to be reluctant to call someone friends quickly, as most people are taught good friends are made slowly, you know ? So don't set your self up.

I've read of the things that annoy people at times about you, just I annoy people with my habits of writing on and on and on. Well, except for here, I work on that.

You make your presence almost unavoidable, and feel compelled to reply to everyone's comment whether the post was specifically directed at you.

We all of course should feel welcome to comment on one another's posts. When it seems like you are room monitoring, it feels like you are being overly-solicitous and, i think, placing yourself unwittingly in a position where people think you are trying to be in control of a room.

Sometimes it may seem to them they cannot make a comment without you holding up a card saying 1 - 10 on it, and telling them they did very well. Or, sometimes you fall back on things all GL major fans hold true in general, and hence are "truisms" and when we speak them, it sounds as if we are preaching to the choir. Most find this annoying.

One other thought JJ, I have some very good friends in the forum you have been doing major battle with at various times, mostly over the last month or two. The post deleting doesn't cut it, and while I do not know the truth personally as to whether you have any other personas/IDS out there, generally speaking when that many people yell smoke, there generally is fire.

I remain open minded JJ, and I've never said you are not a friend. I believe our respective behaviour over time will determine how you think of me and vice-versa. No need to be in a hurry.
No one is trying to drive a wedge between us, either. I assure you.

It would be awhile before that would be a relevant thing anyway, if you and I decided over time we are good friends. And BTW , when I say you can seem annoying by certain behavior, I am trying to do you a favour by letting you know the basic kind if things I needed to hear at first, and I do not think you are an annoying person.

I just think you are a tough enough man that would want to hear truth some have substituted slams for. Others, like many of the people I correspond with, have been quite understanding with your (and my !) "annoying things".

Another thing - many of us have come to worry about you some times, so don't scare us with the "suicide..maybe ?" stuff. Not funny, man.

None of this is a slam at all about you JJ, I think much of it, to tell you the truth, is things that people who call you good friend should have told you for awhile now anyway. I think some have tried here and there. But, I am not saying them in anger.

I was told by several VERY good people that in reality, they DID in fact find MY long posts wearisome and hard to get thru. This was after I learned to break up into paragraphs, even just chunks of lines, so as to be easier to read.

And, fewer run-on sentences. I still do these things off and on, but somewhat less. This long post totally blows my short post resolution, but I wanted you you to have a fair shake here.

Seems to me you are a bit misunderstood. A lot of us have had real bad, even tragic medical backgrounds, so if anything there strikes a note, you are not alone. I read your apology on trolling, and as Cathy wisely said,"he apologized, lets move on" . Cool.

I take it for granted that what I did not even know you were doing, you have stopped. But, you know, if I get to many criteria for friends, I could never be my own friend ! LOL

OK JJ - u take care and thanks for asking about my wife. - geo steve

P.S. Point being, be more concerned of your own ideals than what others say about you, or, worse yet, what you fear they say. You'll drive yourself crazy wondering about that, like, how is it you said "like the fly who walks up the wall" or something LOL. Don't worry. I'll end with this. Gord is the man , right ? So... when in doubt, what would he do in a given situation, as quiet, humble, good, decent, and kind a talented man as he is ?
Take care JJ
geo Steve